


Room 17, or the Strip Poker Drinking Game

by a_thousand_sails



Series: TMI Shorts [3]
Category: Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Alec is adorable, Fluff, Jace is strange, Magnus is protective, Multi, One-Shot, you can see that malec is my heart
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-31
Updated: 2016-01-31
Packaged: 2018-05-17 10:27:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,242
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5865889
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/a_thousand_sails/pseuds/a_thousand_sails
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>On the anniversary of Max's death, Jace tries to cheer everyone up in his own *special* way.</p><p>This is utter nonsense.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Room 17, or the Strip Poker Drinking Game

It was the anniversary of Max's death. Maryse and Robert hadn't exited their room, while Alec and Isabelle were both subdued and quiet. Simon and Magnus had both come over, and were awkwardly tiptoeing around their miserable lovers. Jace had tried to restrain his natural energy, and was starting to think he would explode if this went on any longer. Clary had good-naturedly thought to give them all some space, but Jace wished she hadn't gone to spend the day with Luke. They needed some of her brightness and life today.

That was when Jace had an idea. He knew exactly what everyone needed today - something crazy. They needed to forget. And so he started planning.

 

Alec was slumped on the floor in front of the tv. Isabelle had put some sort of melodramatic soapie on, and he was staring at the changing colours with no recognition. He started at a touch to his shoulder, then blushed when he realized it was just Jace. 

He accepted the hand his parabatai extended towards him, allowing himself to be pulled to his feet. He didn't really hear what Jace muttered to him, but followed him obediently. He just hoped it wasn't a demon attack or anything serious. He was in no condition to- well, none of them were.

He was relieved to find himself in the kitchen, Jace shoving a glass into his hand. He chugged the water down gratefully, before spluttering and choking as his throat burned. The glass crashed to the floor as he turned on Jace. 

Jace grimaced at the shocked, pained expression on Alec's face and caught him as he stumbled. It was a rather low blow, tricking his parabatai, but it was all for his own good. Alec was an extreme lightweight, and had had to swallow as much as possible in order to breathe, as Jace had hoped. In a while he would be completely intoxicated. 

Murmuring soothingly as Alec regained his breath raggedly and protested, Jace slung his adopted brother over his shoulder and headed for the room he had prepared. Room 17 of the Institute, it was always gathering dust. Alec was already sluggish and dazed-looking by the time he was deposited on the couch, and curled around a pillow with an inaudible mutter. 

Grinning at his success so far, Jace decided to go for Isabelle next. He found her in her room, absently brushing her hair. He was mildly creeper out by it. Tugging at her hand, he ignored her swearing at him, and dragged her to the kitchen.

"You need a drink, Iz."

For once, she agreed with him, and downed a shot of the illicit vodka Jace stored behind the never-used baking supplies. Now that she was inclined to be a bit more reckless, he gave her the bottle and more glasses, and told her to get Simon drunk and meet him in room 17. With an evil grin, she flounced off.

Giving a mental fistpump, Jace went after Magnus. He merely had to suggest that his boyfriend needed a cuddle, and mention his location, before the warlock was off. Any hint that he was a less than perfect boyfriend instantly drove Magnus to action. It was almost too easy. 

Jace himself had already imbibed a fair amount of alcohol, and looking at Isabelle and Simon it seemed like they hadn't exactly been stingy either. Simon was talking at the top of his voice, Izzy giggling nonstop. Magnus was holding his clingy boyfriend close, and demanded a drink for himself. While Jace went a little crazy, Isabel got ditsy and Simon obnoxious, Alec was a sleepy, cuddly drunk and Magnus said he wasn't affected. However, to Jace's eyes he always seemed more erratically fabulous after a couple of glasses. 

This was all going perfectly. Clearing his throat, Jace stepped into the middle of the haphazard circle of couches and old bean bags that he had scrounged from other rooms. 

"Greetings, fellow Shadowhunters. I have brought you all here for a very important ritual. This ritual is designed to test your tolerance of alcohol and your ability to act under pressure. It is otherwise known as the Strip Poker Drinking Game. Listen up, the rules are extremely complicated..."

Jace proceeded to rattle off a load of nonsense that served his purposes: getting everyone drunk and naked. This may or may not have been a result of Jace's inner exhibitionist. 

Magnus scowled at him, seeing exactly where this was going. He was, however, invested in ensuring that his boyfriend lost the least amount of clothes...  
Jace grinned. This was going to be fun. 

No-one understood the rules, but it was clear that Isabelle was winning. While everyone was getting steadily inebriated, she had only lost her thigh-high boots and patterned leather jacket. Simon was shirtless. Jace had, in a surprising turn of events, shucked his pants first, of all things. Magnus had deliberately played dumb, but due to the unintelligible nature of the rules and his own habitual lack of clothing, both he and Alec were in their boxers.  
It was rather cute, actually. Magnus was holding tightly to Alec, covering his pale skin with his own, while Alec was only too happy to wrap himself onto Magnus like a mini-octopus. 

Taking pity on them, Isabelle gracefully lost her socks and the game progressed, if only to the point where Jace dropped his underwear and everyone shouted at him. And then he said that in order to undo a player's move, everyone else had to lose a piece as well.

Magnus protested, but when faced with the prospect of a naked Jace he conceded. Unashamedly taking of his own underwear, Magnus hugged Alec to himself and used magic to remove the drunk Shadowhunter's. Alec was left laying on his boyfriend, nearly asleep, while the warlock wrapped his hands over Alec's ass with as much dignity as he could summon. 

Isabelle took off her overtop, but was wearing a tank top underneath, which everyone except Simon said was unfair. Simon himself took off his pants, and then Jace pulled his boxers back up. Everyone sighed in relief. No-one minds the lovebugs being naked, he complained to himself, wishing Clary was there to boost his injured ego. 

The game was ended there, drunks stumbling back to their rooms in various states of undress. It was mutually agreed upon, however, that the game become an annual tradition, and Jace interjected that Clary should be included, which was also agreed upon. 

Isabelle and Simon supported each other back to her room, to cuddle and sleep off the alcohol. Jace wandered off to phone Clary and beg for a make-out session. Magnus, still clutching at his boyfriend's modesty, was carrying him back to his room, when a startled yelp made him turn to the stairwell. Alec was by now fast asleep in his arms, and did not stir while his mother gaped in horror. Face turning beetroot beneath his foundation, Magnus turned back and hurried down the corridor.

Maryse also turned, and hurried straight back to her room, mentally scarred. Her poor baby was dangling from that incorrigible warlock's grasp, stark naked. If she went back and restarted the day perhaps it would simply cease to exist? 

 

A/N: This was weird, but I needed it. First TMI fic! First humour fic! First one-shot! Wow. I haven't read the books in like ages, so please forgive me and be gentle.


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